Deliverance

I started writing my personal handwritten journal in 2006. It is entitled Death, Divorce, Deliverance. I like to call that period of my life the dark ages. I was going through the barrage of emotional stages that death and divorce can bring, but I knew that deliverance was soon to come...it had to. When I go back and read some of my entries, I realize that it really and truly was a a dark and lonely time for me.

As I started to think about deliverance, I thought "What exactly does it mean?" The only think that came to my mind at the time was Moses. He was called the Deliverer. And that song from "The Prince of Egypt" (Deliver Us) just kept going through my mind. I am not ashamed to say that I had to look up the word deliverance! I found the following adjectives: Release, Liberation, Freedom, Rescue, Relief.

Well, today I can truly say that I have been released, liberated, freed, rescued and relieved.

During my dark ages , I felt SO ALL ALONE. But as I look back, I see that I wasn't alone at all. God was there the whole time, even though I felt like he had forsaken me, he hadn't.
My mother had this picture hanging in her dining room for years. It is a picture of Jesus Silhouette carrying a lady on the beach. This had always been one of my favorite pictures, but it lost it's meaning to me during my dark ages. I have had the picture hanging in my bedroom but hadn't really given it much thought until around November of last year.

It embodies the poem "Footprints".

Footprints in the Sand

One night I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord.

Many scenes from my life flashed across the sky.

In each scene I noticed footprints in the sand.

Sometimes there were two sets of footprints,

other times there were one set of footprints.

This bothered me because I noticed

that during the low periods of my life,

when I was suffering from

anguish, sorrow or defeat,

I could see only one set of footprints.

So I said to the Lord,

"You promised me Lord,

that if I followed you,

you would walk with me always.

But I have noticed that during

the most trying periods of my life

there have only been one

set of footprints in the sand.

Why, when I needed you most,

you have not been there for me?"

The Lord replied,

"The times when you have

seen only one set of footprints in the sand,

is when I carried you."

Mary Stevenson

Copyright © 1984 Mary Stevenson, from original 1936 text, All rights reserved